42 Comments

Henceforth this President will be called a consummate Griffey-ter.

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No. Have you thought about what madness and confusion would stem from renaming Griffith Observatory to Griffey Observatory?

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Maybe we could name a few things after the musician Kenny G to add some variety

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The amount of America's time that Trump has managed to waste on the dumbest shit in the world is unbelievable. And I'd love to just ignore him, but if everyone took that position, we'd be living in a country where everything was named after him by 2028.

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Good point! However, Jeff's point about the naming wars is correct and here in the SF Bay Area we have plenty of naming and renaming scandals wasting everyone's time. It's expensive, stupid & only makes a very small class of people feel better while everyone else trudges on attempting to navigate the increasing chaos as the doubling down continues.

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Oh, I agree that there have been plenty of people on the left who get involved in this nonsense as well. It's all such a terrific waste of time and resources. That being said, the President can cause disruption on such a larger scale, so it's disappointing to see a man who is not qualified to be a city council member sitting in the most powerful seat in the nation.

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Look we don't have to name EVERY mountain and school after Ken Griffey, Jr.

But can we name at least SOME of them after him? Surely we have room enough for this.

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Maybe split the country at the Mississippi? Everything to the West is Griffey, everything to the East is Bagwell. (Played half his career in a pitcher friendly dome and still had incredible stats!)

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The peril here is the possibility of bringing Jeter fans into the conversation.

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Agreed. If it came down to a choice between naming a state park after Derek Jeter or dissolving the entire nation, I'd start building a bunker in my back yard and stockpiling toilet paper. It wouldn't even be a choice.

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I think you mean Ripken

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Bagwell was a poor man's Frank Thomas!

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I’m hoping that was a Frank compliment. Only as a hitter, but a phenomenal hitter. I’m 59, and he’s one of the best right hand combination of power and average in my lifetime.

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Oh definitely, he’s my all-time favorite player. Bagwell was also great. They were actually born on the same day!

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I am canceling my subscription in protest of this genocide against Tony Gwynn. (That's how you use that word, right)

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So I take it you haven't spent much time in Atlanta. They have an inordinate number of streets with "Peachtree" in the name and it is very confusing. I have actually wasted several hours of my life in traffic, extricating myself from being lost because I was headed for the wrong one.

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I HAVE spent time in Atlanta and I fucking HATE THAT!!!

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Southern California has way too many Orange Avenues.

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The schools should be Ken Griffey, Jr., Junior High School and Ken Griffey, Jr., Senior High School

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This may be one of your best ideas. In addition to all the wonderfulness, when some kids at Yankee Stadium asked him to come to the Yankees he said, “If they were the only team to offer me a contract, I’d retire.”

To celebrate the namings, this 45sec video of him scoring from first base could be on a loop on every elevator, gas pump, and bus stop https://youtu.be/F8SBJzOEcyU?si=ei4xPhfWX-sVL0NE

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Honestly, I'm disgusted by the misogyny of these suggestions. Did you even consider naming everything as some variation on the VERY FIRST WORD people across ALL CULTURES say? Some variation of "Mama".

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The best proposals are always the ones that are properly modest. ;)

Come to think of it, I think they’re kinda trying this out in North Korea…

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I still believe we should rename Gulf of Mexico to Gulf of Margaritaville. And I'm surprised we haven't renamed Canadian Bacon to 51st State Bacon.

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Imagining a world where every house has a portrait of Griffey in the dining room like he's JFK.

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HOW DARE YOU INSULT TONY GWYNN

otherwise where do I vote for this

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While I stand by my belief that Gwynn wasn't quite as good as the best players of his era, I love the crazy Tony-Gwynn-only stats that he racked up, like how he had faced Greg Maddux 103 times and never struck out, or how he could have played two more full years, gotten zero hits in those two years, and still finished with a career batting average over .300.

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Yesss I love those ridiculous tidbits.

Also, I have to say, him dying before having any chance of ruining his legacy definitely helps when it comes to naming potential. I'm not saying Griffey is gonna go looney tunes QAnon nuts any day now, but the fact remains that he COULD, and where would all our schools/lakes/landmarks be then?

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Great idea, but lets expand on it a little. Each state can choose up to 5 ball players from any major sport. In MI we could have Zeke, Miggy, Barry, Calvin, and Stevie Y for all schools, airports etc.

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