39 Comments

My local news recently featured a hard hitting piece on edible tape that holds burritos closed.

Expand full comment

Celeb/Public trials just feel like a version of Marc Andreesen's "Current Thing". When a new Current Thing drops, everyone has to have an opinion. Most NPC's just download what they need to know or say (Is there a team Depp emoji? Gotta get that Ukraine flag next to my raised fist/rose in my bio!) from whatever source they trust most.

You will probably hear from many current lawyers and some former lawyers (like myself) that will also tell you that trials are incredibly rare and that the ones we know about and are privy to are Unicorn outliers that aren't anything like normal trials. Trials and law are also fact-specific. The beauty of the common law system is that precedent rules, but what makes it infinitely malleable is that no two cases have the exact same facts. Lawyers can and do argue about why the facts in any particular case are similar/dissimilar to prior cases.

Expand full comment

"maybe you feel that it’s generally understood that we’re not all walking around with, say, a working knowledge of North Carolina maritime law"

Maybe *you're* not, but any true Arrested Development fan certainly should be: https://youtu.be/TdeSh3vLvYI

Expand full comment

I'm proud to say that what little I know about the Jack Sparrow trial I learned from this column.

Expand full comment

I am truly puzzled by how people are not only getting swept up in this but also fervently defending either side. How are you coming to the conclusion that either of them is completely innocent? I'm tired of thinking about people thinking about this trial and while I know very little, I don't even want to know as much as I do. That is as far as my opinion goes on this case.

Expand full comment

Celebrity Trials have been a thing for almost as long this country has been around. In England in 1820 there was the trial of Queen Caroline whom the King was trying to divorce/strip of her titles that was more sensational than whatever the Depp/Heard trial is about. Heck, I imagine there were scalpers selling tickets to the Joan of Arc trial even though most people couldn't figure out what she was on trial for.

Expand full comment

I suppose the real question is: do you think someone who reads your Substack doesn’t already think something along these lines?

Expand full comment

Man-on-the-street Interviews are the best thing about local news though!

Expand full comment

Good point. I’ll try to do better. Like using duct tape when a controversial topic comes up. On my mouth.

Expand full comment