Nations That Are Ignoring Their Old Climate Agreement Reach New Climate Agreement

What a breakthrough!

The Washington Post called it a “breakthrough”. The New York Times dubbed it “a potentially trajectory-altering moment in the fight against climate change.” On Wednesday, diplomats from 200 countries approved an agreement that calls for the world to move away from fossil fuels. It’s been lauded with language matched only by reviews of the Taylor Swift tour movie, which is obviously the greatest artistic achievement in the history of human kind unless you hate women. Journalists seem to be on the cusp of inventing new words to describe this agreement; I wouldn’t be surprised to see a Guardian headline that reads: “Splendagitastical Agreement Signed!”

I, however, would use different words to describe this climate agreement. I’m tempted to use words like “piddly”, “irrelevant”, or even “a PR wank fest with minimal real-world impact”. I might even go so far to call it “something that perpetuates a misunderstanding of how climate change will and won’t get solved”, and — whoops! — I just did call it that. So let me explain why I’m underwhelmed.